FUN AND JOKE

They have started again 😂😂😂😂😂 My wife and I went to the big MARKET JUST NOW. Of course, we had our FACEMASKS  on. When we got there, there were too many people. That was when I decided that we had to leave immediately. So, I pulled my wife to go home afraid that we might catch the virus..But, my wife wanted me to let go of her and did not want to go home! OMG! Stubborn wife as always! I literally had to drag her, lifted her, balanced her on my shoulder and ran to the parking lot where I then threw her back into the car!!! In the car, she was quiet and totally ignored me. Even when I tried to explain it was for her own benefit, she remained silent and very furious !!!! Finally, we got home. I parked the car and she still refused to leave the car. Again I dragged her out, carried her shoulder high and threw her into the the sofa in the living room. I then sat down, facing her...and we removed our FACEMASKS... She was not my Wife!!! BE CAREFUL... STAY AT HOME...”.. Before...

General Warning!! If you see a married man online at 2am, Don’t text him - it’s a trap. Usually it is the wife on patrol at that time. Thank me later... 😂 😂 😂 😂 😂

Someone should please help me out on this.... My neighbour's long time friend just visited from the States and was about to leave when she beckoned on her kids and offered them $1,000....(360k). Only for these children to say "Thank you Ma, our parents warned us never to collect gifts from strangers." 🙄🙄🙄 Choi! my neighbour  almost shouted aloud- Which parent said  that to you?? Meanwhile, she was really loosing herself ooo... How can these children do this to us, as she kept staring at them Her eyes are still on her palms and trying to surpress the anger abi tears $1,000 cannot just  pass like that.  Should she loose the family tradition or what biko nu ooo. The lady is still there talking with them. My neighbour is just nodding and thinking  of how to remind the kids of the family  clause  that whatever Daddy did not approve does not apply. Or just call them out and try to convince them to go and collect this money and shun mummy's wa...

Husband: I lost my wife. She went shopping and hasn't come back. Inspector: What is her height? Husband: I never checked Inspector: Slim or robust? Husband: Not slim, may be robust. Inspector: Colour of her eyes? Husband: Never noticed Inspector: Color of hair? Husband: Changes according to season. Inspector: What was she wearing? Husband: Not sure if it was a dress or suit. Inspector: Was she driving? Husband: Yes. Inspector: Colour of car? Husband: Black Audi A8 with supercharged 3.0 liter V6 engine 333 horse power, teamed with an eight-speed tiptronic automatic transmission with manual mode. And it has full LED headlights which use light emitting diodes for all light functions and has a very thin scratch on the front left door... and...and... (starts sobbing) Inspector: Don't worry sir, we will find your car.. 😂 Abi what do you think he was really looking for..? His wife or his car..?😂

Time: 3Hrs 30MINS INSTRUCTIONS: 1 _ATTEMPT ALL QUESTIONS_ 2 _ALL QUESTIONS MUST BE ATTEMPTED IRRESPECTIVE OF GENDER_ 1. You are a married man and you have dated somebody's wife for two years, busy spending on her like there is no tomorrow.  eventually she drops you and concentrates on her innocent husband. Calculate the percentage of time wasted. (20 marks) 2. You bought a phone for your friend's wife and she gave it to her husband. Using trigonometric identities, derive a general formula for this type of love. (20 marks) 3. For Men You're dating around 15 ladies and every lady is demanding for a Samsung Galaxy and an iPhone 6s (a) Plot a graph of detoothers against prices of phones. (15marks) (b) Use your graph to estimate your future poverty (5marks) (c) Plot the percentage shame against volume of apologies to your family members.  (5 Mks) 4. You are whatsapping and facebooking other people's wives yet you don't want to see your wife on the social ...

A young man attended a Wednesday Night Bible Study and the Pastor preached about listening to GOD and obeying the Lord's voice. The young man couldn't help but ponder, 'Does GOD still speak to people?' After service, he went out with some friends for coffee and pie and they discussed the message. They talked about how GOD had led them in different ways. It was about ten o'clock when the young man started driving home, and he prayed; ' GOD...If you still speak to people, speak to me. I will listen. I will do my best to obey.' As he drove down the main street of his town, he had the strangest thought to stop and buy a gallon of milk. He shook his head and said out loud, GOD is that you?' He didn't get a reply and started on toward home. But again, the thought, buy a gallon of milk came. The young man thought about Samuel and how he didn't recognize the voice of GOD, and how little Samuel ran to Eli. 'Okay, GOD, in case that is you, I will b...